Showing posts with label sex. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sex. Show all posts

Thursday, October 22, 2009

It's not "rape" unless you say it twice in a row.



The obvious denial of the circumstances by outspoken celebrities in support of movie director Roman Polanski cannot be starker than Whoopi Goldberg’s televised “rape-rape” statement on The View a few weeks back. Apparently, many Hollywood celebs say that the judicial system should overlook his physical, emotional, and psychological assault on a little girl (a crime) just because he happened to successfully run away from his trial sentencing (another crime) for 30 years.

But what can anyone say in defense of the obviously indefensible? Redefine harm? Make lame excuses? Indeed, like marrying a rich ailing widow for her fortune, there is no cliché that gets more repeat performances than the classic movie star wave-off after being caught in sexual immorality.

Just in case anyone is wondering, "pleading guilty to having sex with a minor" equals statutory rape EQUALS rape-rape-rape-rape.

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Driscoll not PG about sex. Amen!

Axiom: If you want to get conservative church folk really riled up, talk about s-e-x…out loud...on Sunday morning…in the sermon…and skip the metaphors. That’s the reaction pastor Mark Driscoll of Mars Hill Church in Seattle is getting from many prominent Christians in the evangelical world. In the latest iterations of protest against Driscoll, Bott Radio Network interrupted one of its programs midway and cancelled another program’s scheduled radio interview at the behest of the network’s founder, Dick Bott, just for featuring Driscoll. According to conservative publications and commentators, like the Baptist Press and others, Mark Driscoll is on a Christian no-no list for saying no-no things, if you get my drift. Among the adjectives used for his language are “vulgar”, “unwholesome,” “coarse,” “filthiness,” and so forth.

It is a fact that Driscoll offends conservative Christian sensibilities concerning sex talk with non-PG language. Now here’s a question that I have: Since when is sex ever rated PG? Sex is for the married. You can be married only if you are 18 (in most states). And, if you are over 18, what about talking about sex should really offend? Why should the fact that he says “sex” out loud and not “s-e-x” give adults with mature attitudes trouble, except if they are not so mature after all?

After reviewing several blog rants and even a four-part article dedicated to criticizing Driscoll’s sermons on the Song of Solomon (which quickly boil down to criticisms about his person and faith), I cannot help but become aware of the river of problems under the church running far deeper than the issue of Mark Driscoll’s mouth. For example, sex is almost always discussed negatively. Driscoll himself observes that the primary message sent to most church youth is that “sex is gross…it’s dirty, nasty, vile, and wrong, so save it for the one you love.” How many Christian couples suffer in silence over sexual issues because they’ve been conditioned to think that sex is too taboo to discuss at church and among believers? In response, some believers might consider the wisdom of the secular world and then struggle over appealing to a source that is so maligned within the church as well. Church, which should be the safest place on earth to talk about healthy sexuality, is sadly the most unsafe and the last place anyone dares talk about it.

I listened to a fair share of Driscoll’s sermons, especially the ones that relate to this topic. There could be the rare occasion that he gets graphic in such a way that might offend (but in listening to three+ hours--and counting--of sermons, I have yet to hear anything even close). I’ve come to the opinion that the messages he delivers are far more important to the listener than the concerns of his critics. He is neither vulgar nor treats sex in marriage as a joke. Vulgarity demeans and degrades people or actions. Driscoll is doing the opposite. He is trying to save marriages and relationships. Not only that, he is trying to save wedded bliss from being the stuff of fairytales and/or the first two weeks of marriage.

Marriage is sacred, which is exactly why Driscoll’s sex talk is badly needed in the evangelical world. Our churchgoers no longer know what the body is used for and how to enjoy it in the way we were created. We have allowed the ungodly secular world determine what is impermissible and "dirty" for believers instead of believers charging the world with its perversion and taking back sexual pleasure under the dominion of the kingdom of God.

Mark Driscoll in general makes people with conservative sensibilities uneasy and takes the fun out of being a liberal. I gotta say that I kind of like that.

Sunday, November 25, 2007

The Last Thing You'd Never Talk About

to Mom and Dad...

Pastor and blogger, Peter Ong, has spoken exceptionally candidly about sex in his latest post, a hail-back to a recent conference session. Here is an exerpt:

On our college campuses we have young people who raise their hands as they
worship God in the felly halls but in their dorms they are using their hands in
other ways, we have leaders who are continuing to lead without a mention of what
their private worlds are like (once again, they are simply a function for us as
ministry workers), we have pastors who are left unchecked when they are
“prepping” their sermons, and we have so many of our married couples who still
don’t know how to have sex in a Godly healthy manner.

Our silence has murdered our call to purity. It has been this sin of
omission that we are so afraid to ask and be asked of this area of our lives
that has been a ground zero for so many of us.

I think he has hit the nail on the head with the attitudes about sex common to Asian churches. Churches have mostly employed the "don't ask, don't tell" method of dealing with the issue or attempted to cover the topic with weak presentations aimed at encouraging youth not to ask any followup questions.

So that I don't appear too critical, I believe that it might be too difficult for our typical Asian churches to deal with the subject of sex in this generation (so we should consider cutting them some slack). First generation immigrants will likely balk, and our curious youth might be better served in a more non-Asian environment to talk about sexual issues.

Comments?